Saturday, January 16, 2010

Super Tan!

Article written for

Guys are so funny about masturbating. They will do it fucking ANYWHERE. And while I, and every other girl I know (who will admit it) masturbate too, I don’t think I have ever done it somewhere strange or vaguely inappropriate - save my my bed in the ballet dormitory, while my roommate was sleeping two feet away. But that doesn’t count, because she was wearing ear plugs. Besides, we were there for months - it was bound to happen sooner or later. And she prolly did it too while I was snoring away beside her. Other than that, though, I have never felt the urge to tickle myself outside of my own home.

Until today, that is.

A couple of days ago, Boyfriend and I were upstairs in our bedroom, going at it doggy style. Bf must have eaten his fucking Wheaties that morning, cuz he was pounding me so hard, I wondered, do I owe him money? When he would ram it in really hard, it would hit this spot inside me that felt so good I would momentarily forget that it kept causing me to bang my head into the wall. Twas a thing of beauty.

Anyway, I was running around this afternoon, and after working last night I was in desperate need of a nap. I decided I would kill two birds with one stone and go for a tan, so I could get pretty and get some sleep. Ten minutes later I was lubed up and goggled, and ready for my snooze. I strapped on Mr. Reznor (my iPod) and climbed into the bed, sighing happily as I stretched out for my twenty minute nap. After a couple of seconds, though, I realized that it was requiring far too much effort to lie on my back. I flipped over onto my belly and stretched out again, and as I was trying in vain to get comfortable, I accidentally rubbed my clit piercing against the hard plastic of the bed. A shock rushed through my groin and I laughed, but I kept my body still and tried to ignore it - I really needed to get some sleep.

But alas, the damage was done. My mind started to wander back to the sensation Bf had pounded into me the other night, and before I knew it, I was pushing my pelvic bone into the bed and rubbing my clit ring against the hard plastic.

Now, before you freak out, I was wearing pvc (plastic) underwear, so rubbing myself against a sanitized plastic bed really isn’t that gross. Still, when I knew for certain that I was going to ride this thing through to the end (pun intended), I got out of the bed and grabbed the towel that had been left in the room for me (though presumably NOT so I could masturbate with it). I lay the towel down in the middle of the bed and positioned myself on top of it, then ground my pussy into my hand until I came, just a few seconds later.

It didn’t occur to me until I was finished just how loud a creaking tanning bed could be. One would assume that the tremendous noise generated by the bed would drown out absolutely everything, but judging by the smirks on the receptionists’ faces as I left, one would be so very, very wrong.

Whatever, I thought. It was worth it. And now that it's done, I feel like I am part of an elite crew of people that can masturbate anywhere! Together, we could be like a team of Super Heroes, engaging our special skills in random public places throughout the city. Of course, we won’t actually help anyone other than ourselves, but again - whatever.

Ooooh, and think how cool the costumes would be! All covered faces and exposed genitals, with hand lotion and baby oil attached to our utility belts for "emergencies".

Of course, I can’t really commit to anything at this exact moment. I am obviously going to be very busy in the next few days, looking for a new place to tan.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...